It’s a hot summer Saturday night dance in Montgomery, Alabama. The local hicks and Yankee soldiers all want to dance with 18 year old Montgomery Belle, Zelda Sayre. Moreover, they all want to take her home into the bargain. Who will strike lucky?

Zelda
No can figure, no can choose
Tails I win “n” tails I lose
I’ve got on my dancing-shoes
“n” one of you can take me home tonight

Lucky me, you lucky guys
I must be in paradise
C’mon fellas, harmonise
“n” one of you can take me home tonight

Hicks
Zelda don’t you know we love you madly?
We’ll do anything you want us to, gladly
So put us out of misery

Zelda
How did I get in this jam?
Don’t think I don’t give a –
I’m sorry boys, I really am
But only one can take me home tonight

Boys forgive me pretty please
I don’t mean to be a tease
C’mon, get up off your knees
But only one can take me home tonight

I don’t wish to be unkind
But I just can’t make up my mind
I’m not playing hard to find
But only one can take me home tonight

Yankees
Things are swell in Alabama
Alabama is a wonderful world
Lost my heart in Alabama
Alabama, you’re a beautiful  girl

Hicks and Yankees
Zelda, if you turn us down, we’re done for
We don’t have no cover we can run for
So put us out of misery

Zelda
No can figure, no can choose
Tails I win ‘n’ tails I lose
I’ve got on my dancing shoes
“n” one of you can take me home tonight